I recently had some portrait shots taken of my beautiful 5 year old. She looked absolutely stunning but she saw the picture and said – ‘Mummy, I don’t like the creases under my arm. They look awful!”
Eeekk…why was my beautiful 5 year old analysing her self like that?! Why, because it’s what I do every time I see a picture of myself. I hate my wrinkles, oh I look terrible in that picture, gosh I look awful. What was I unintentionally teaching her? I was so shocked that she said that and so disappointed in myself for not picking up this habit earlier. I had to stop immediately.
From this point, I started to notice a few things. Women always put themselves down. Always, well most that I come in contact with do. They also, when given a compliment counteract it with a negative.
I had two friends over the other day, who I look at and think how beautiful they are,and we were all telling each other what we hated about ourselves. They hated their skin, their wrinkles, where as when I look at them – I always think they are beautiful, I love their smiles, their hair or the way they are in general. A weekend after that, I went away with a different lot of girls and they were having exactly the same conversation. EXACTLY-THE -SAME, different topics but they were still talking about themselves so negatively.
Growing old has become something negative. My grandparents were covered in wrinkles and not once did I look at them and not see something beautiful. Growing old is inevitable, and it’s a privilege. A privilege that some people don’t get the chance to have.
We are never going to be as young again as we are today, right now, even by the time you get to the end of this article you will be a little older. So what can we do with that?
Yes we know that the lines under our eyes are from our smiles, those few extra kilos or stretch marks are from our babies or even just having a few indulgent meals. We know that but its not always enough to change us. We are facing an uphill battle with the perfection social media/media in general portrays so we have to make the change with in ourselves.
I could tell you a whole bunch of health advice to live a healthier and happier life, I could tell you to exercise, eat right and sleep well but Ive got a different solution. One that is instantaneous, and takes no time at all (I know we all lead very busy lives so I will make it really easy). Next time that voice in your head starts to state the negative – Just stop. Please stop.
Break the habit.
Never say these things in front of your children. They have enough negative body influences in the media without having it in their homes (that’s a whole other article).
Focus on the positives – yes you do have positives, I promise. Learn to love yourself and break the habit of negativity.
See the beauty in your self like you see in your friends, like your friends, family or your children see in you.
They love you just the way you are…and so should you.